Moving on up....

I am still shedding tears every day. . .but I am getting stronger!  I simply started thinking of all the negative. . . all the lies, half-truths, pain & misery you caused me!  I always knew deep down inside - you were only around for as long as I was providing for you & that as soon as you could stand on your own you'd be gone - you're just the same as everyone else I've ever been with!  I could sense it, read it in you (you're not the only one good at reading people).
I see now just how truly pathetic you are & how dishonest you are!  You judge & hate people so violently without just cause and I think it's because it's easier to hate them than yourself!  The people who call you out for what you really are. . .you want nothing to do with & you reflect your internal negativity onto them!  You don't love anyone. . .you are simply in love with the idea of being in love!
I WAS happy when you first got here, but your extreme anger, self-loathing, cries of wanting to die & boo hooing about how everyone would be better off without you around, being afraid to speak because i didn't want to send you off into a rant, afraid not to speak because that too would set you off. . . it's no wonder I was so miserable & depressed all the time!!
It's not ALL your fault, I do have a lot of issues and problems in my life that I allow to bring me down. . .NO MORE!!!  I let you bring me down too & then you useed that as an excuse to leave?!?!?! 
I hope & pray you change your ways, that you let go of your anger, that you are truly happy & really love your girlfriend of 9 days (HA HA HA - that's not love. . .it's infatuation!)!  But I hope that infatuation does grow into love & you find your peace & happiness in this world! 
Someday I will find that someone special who loves me for me, not what I can do for them.  A true partner.  I feel sorry for this person because they will have to go through a lot to earn my trust and love. . . but that's when I'll know they are the real thing!  Someone who can & wants to take care of me as much I do them!